It is amazing how sin steals so much from our lives. Today, God in His mercy revealed again some areas of sin that I have hung on to. Areas such as jealousy, envy, performance, wanting approval and this defensive nature seem to be more real than God's righteousness. I know sin has clouded my heart and mind. I can say all the right things, act the right way and yet not seem to live in the fullness of life that God promises. It's like the color of life is sucked right out of relationships and everything I do.
Over the past 2 months, I have read and reread "The Shack". So much of the transformation that is happening for me is due to the beautiful story of relationship that unfolds between our Triune God and a man named Mack. Mack who through a series of horrible life events, spends a weekend with God. During a conversation with Jesus, Mack comes to the end of himself...a place where performance and saying the right things just don't cut it any longer. Knowing that all of his paradigms for being a Christian have been crushed, he asks Jesus, "So what do I do now?" I love the reply. Jesus says "...learn to live loved."
This is the goal of my sabbatical...that I will learn to live as the beloved little girl wrapped in her Papa's warm embrace of grace.
When our daughter Lauren was little, after baths I would scoop her up in a towel, hold her on my lap and sing "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are gray. You'll never know dear, how much I love you. Please don't take my sunshine away." Then I would go on to "I love you, a bushel and a peck. A bushel and a peck and a hug around the neck. A hug around the neck and a barrel and heap. A barrel and a heap and I'm talking in my sleep about you....I love you, a bushel and a peck. You bet your pretty neck I do." She would sit in my lap soaking up the love and truth of those words. I desperately want my children to know that I am crazy about them.
Even more, God wants us to know that He is wild about us. I read from God's word Zephaniah 3:17, "The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, He will quiet you with his love and He will rejoice over you with singing." Could it be that God wants me to run into His lap and receive His love song? Does He want to sing, "you are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are gray.....?" Does He really delight in me...even when I mess up?
Yes, it is so true. This truth is bringing color back into my life. I AM LOVED. YOU ARE LOVED. Jesus bares the scars to prove it. We need not look any further for love, acceptance, approval, security or significance. Our Father is ready and willing to shower us with His goodness. I hope you hear Him humming a lovely tune while He keeps this day in motion. It's His love song for you and me.
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