Today has already been a struggle. You know these kind of days. We all have them. The kind of days that tension seems to fill you up before your feet hit the floor. Worries over the littlest things overwhelm me. Why? I wish that I could get final victory over these emotions. These moments make me feel like a failure in my walk. This is just so ridiculous.
It is during times like this that I must remember God's truth and stand firm on these truths instead of allowing emotions to run wild. Emotions are definitely a part of our DNA. And they are definitely used by God to help us draw closer to Him. However, we cannot base our response to life on these emotions. Our emotions are real and should not be denied as if they do not exist. Likewise, we must bring our emotions to God in meditation and prayer. Recognizing these feelings can bring us to a closer walk and intimacy with God.
As we begin to recognize the movement at the core of our being, at the core of our hearts, we can ask ourselves some defining questions. Questions such as:
... Which feelings lead me to the Lord?
... Which feelings lead me away from the Lord?
... Are these feelings a direct result of wounds past or present?
... Am I allowing God to enter into these feelings: giving Him freedom to bring about His good purpose?
I have been given some incredible resources on prayer of examen. These are times of meditation when we sit with God to look over our days allowing Him to kindly and gently lead us in transformation. Over the next few days I will share some of these resources.
The first resource that I would suggest is so simple. Sit down at the end of your day (you may want to journal this time) and meditate on the best and worst parts of your day. Take a look over the last 24 hours asking God to help you see the best time during your day. This may have been a moment of quiet when you felt at peace. It may have been a belly laugh with a friend. It may have been smelling spring in the air. Whatever it was... take time to really consider what the best part of your day was and how God gave it to you. Thank Him for it... let it sink into your heart that this was a time when God was saying, "I Love You and am especially fond of You. I created that moment for you."
Next think through the last 24 hours and consider what was the worst part of your day. Why was it bad? How did it affect you? Did you look for God in this time? What does God want to say to you? Now let me warn you, this is not a time to beat yourself up. This is a time to allow God to love you again. You see, it is when we see our failures and still allow God to love us deeply in it that we move toward intimacy. Let's face it... when do you feel the most loved? Is it when you receive accolades for a job well done? Or is it when you mess it up and someone draws close, loving you in your mess? Again allow God to tell you that He is crazy about you even when you screw up. You are dearly and deeply pleasing to Him no matter what you may do or not do.
Now thank God for the best part of your day and for the worst. Both can bring us closer to God, creating a heart of thanksgiving and dependence on Him.
Papa thank you for loving us when we are down, tense, worrisome, troubled, when we are giddy with joy and every emotion in between. Papa I remain in you. Papa I relax in you. Papa I release day to You.
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